5 months of eternity, and the patience to face it!

When I was younger, I used to think that after engagement, the time till the wedding would fly because of how excited and swept away I would be! But now here I am, 5 and a half months from me and my fiance's wedding, and its torture!
Everyday is a test of patience and faith! I find myself saying, it'll come sooner than I think, and then again it won't, but then again it will! Ha Ha!
My mind keeps going over, "Stand still, and wait upon the Lord." We both have waited so long for the one person we were meant to spend the rest of our lives with, so why now, when we have finally found them, do our patience fail us?! But I think I have found that the Lord is showing me personally, that I have yet more time to dedicate to patience! I couldn't be more thankful that the Lord has brought Daniel to me, but I am not yet patient enough! Sometimes the time needed to dedicate to practicing true patience is given to us in a time and place that seems unnecessary! But what better time to practice patience then before marriage?!
Every day, the Lord shows me how he knows best, and to just trust him, and wait! I am so thankful the Lord hasn't given up on me, and that he still stands by me, leading me and teaching me as his child! In the end it comes down to, "Are you going to trust God? Or are you going to take your life into your own hands again, and speed things up?!" Christian, we must also remember that the Lord's timing is perfect, I know that from past experience! Trying to speed up God's plan is like ordering a three course meal all blended together into a food smoothie! The end result in both pictures are messy and unappetizing!
The Lord wasn't kidding when he labeled patience as being a virtue! It is one fruit of the spirit that comes slowly for me! But I want so much to be a patient person, and in the end, the only way I will succeed is to pray, and give it to God, and he will do the rest!
Remember Christian, the Lord has all the patience you will ever need, plus a million times over! Be thankful that he is patient, cause had he given us what we deserved, we are eternally lost! But for some reason, he chooses to be merciful! He loves us more than any spouse, friend, or family member! We are his cherished creation, and through his grace do we thrive! Live your life day to day at the feet of God! I post this under the knowledge, I have yet to be truly patient! I have no desire to be a big talker, little doer! But I pray that through my sinful mistakes, you might catch on before you pay the consequences! Thanks for reading my fellow bloggers! Take care and God bless!

Rachel, will you marry me?

Thursday evening, the unexpected happened! I got a call from my courting mate Daniel, and he sounded like he had something heavy on his heart! But no amount of preparing could have caused my heart to be ready for what he did say in the end!
He asked me what was on my heart, and that he really needed to know! So I told him everything that had been on my heart for the past several weeks, not leaving anything out, hoping it would put his mind to rest! I heard him sigh when I was finished, and he said, "Rachel, can I call you back in a few minutes?" I said sure, and he hung up! I sat there wondering what I had said to upset him, sure I had just caused him to struggle with all I had said! For 20 minutes, I wondered and worried, so unaware that he was using that 20 minutes to call his parents, and my parents!
After what seemed like forever he finally called back, and he sounded humbled and excited! I didn't have any idea what I was about to hear! He took a deep breath and said, " I sent you an email, you can open it now." As I opened the email, the picture which I have attached to this post popped up! I was speechless, but Daniel wasn't! Because as I looked at the picture, he said in a voice so tender,"Rachel, will you marry me?" I am pretty sure my heart stopped beating for a split second! As soon as I could breath again, I said, "What else can I say, YES YES!" Right after that, I heard my parents laugh outside the door! Then I knew what had gone on during that 20 minutes! The rest of our conversation consisted of telling each other how much we love each other, and how thankful we are that we are finally engaged! It is the strangest thing to think that in a few months, I will be married, and start a new life with the man who the Lord brought to me! I also thought of the title of this blog, and how underneath it says, "My search for my true love." I have truly found my earthly true love! I am so thankful, and my heart is so full of rejoicing and gladness!
I love Daniel so much, and the best part about it is, I had nothing to do with his coming into my life, it was all of the Lord! Now I just look forward to being the help meet God created me to be, and learning to be a loving wife with the Lord's help! You fellow bloggers have been such a blessing and support, and its my great joy to share my happy news with you! God bless you all and thanks for reading!

Music....it was God's idea!

Music is a powerful tool, and can be used for either a good or bad message! Today, we can say that most music has become corrupt, and people like music for all the wrong reasons!

Music was made to be enjoyed! And it was God's idea! The Bible tells us to sing to ourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, Singing and making melody in our hearts! The Lord loves music, evident by his creation, even the birds have song! We were made to serve and praise the Lord! We praise the Lord through music!

So how heartbreaking to think we no longer sing for our God, but just for ourselves!

I love to sing, it lifts my spirits, and makes me smile when I am having a ruff day! But how much better is it to sing from the heart for our Lord? Make a joyful noise unto the Lord! I want the music I listen to to praise God, and to honor him! It is so important to present the Lord in every aspect of our lives! If we claim to be a Christian, and yet listen to demonic music, what kind of a message are we sending to the unsaved souls of this world?! Search your heart, and your music Christian, are you presenting a good message for the Lord? Just remember, music was God's idea! Thanks for reading and God bless you!

Simple life, not of situation, but of belief!

The choices we make in life often dictate our situation! And depending on whether or not our situation is good or bad, we are happy or sad. That is an ordinary life style! And we make choices every day of our lives, all day long! Sometimes the simplest choices we make can affect us in a bad way! There is one choice I made several years ago, that doesn't dictate my situation, but sets me up for the future, whatever that may be! Accepting Christ into my life, and giving him my heart was a hard struggle against my sinful pride and Independence, but the Lord knew that my heart would break easily, and that I needed him more than anything in this world, so he sent trials my way, and set me up to go back to him!

Every choice you make dictates who you are, whether your responsible, immature, irresponsible, or mature! The choice to follow Christ says this, I am a child of God, and under his protection I will live for the rest of my life! And no matter what, I will never leave my heavenly Father!

I live a happy life, not because its easy, my family struggles everyday, but we are happy, because our hearts belong to God, and he provides everyday for our needs, and is the fulfilment of our lives!

What shall I fear, with God on my side, walking with me every step of the way? Shall I run and hide when he protects me from the wicked one? No Christian, with God, I am complete! He alone awakens the needs and desires that I truly need! He recently presented the fact that I need a help mate, and I am anxiously awaiting the day we will be joined together, but for now, the Lord is my comfort, my father, my match maker! And I will never doubt him, even when I don't understand, because he does, and that is all I need to know, until the Lord sees fit to reveal his plan to me! Just believe in him Christian, simply believe! God bless you all and thanks for reading!

Beautiful Change, Wonderful Joy, Unbelievable Blessing!

With as much as I love to express my life lessons and joys, you would think I would have written alot more than I have! Its been over 2 months since I have written! Not good! So I will try to fill my bloggers in as good as I can!

The Lord has shown me, that the way I dress and act really tells the story of my heart! Before giving my life over to the Lord, the way I acted and dressed was spiritually and physically not modest! I am so thankful that the Lord walked with me every step of the way, even when my heart was far from him, he protected me!

In March of this year, I gave everything to the Lord! It was a true struggle to give up any control I thought I had over my life, and turn my future, and my hopes all over into the Lord's perfect care! How silly you might say, that it would be such a struggle! But every one of us wish to have control over our life, but in reality, the Lord has control! But if we willing submit to him our lives, he carries our burdens, and makes it lighter! Sure, life will never be easy, but with the knowledge that the Lord is in control, we will be greeting our struggles in life with a smile, and a joy that is unlike anything you have ever experienced! Sure right now you say you are happy, and life is not all that bad, but when all your worries and cares are finally passed over to the one who so longs and desires for you to trust HIM, you will find a new joy!

And my God has blessed me with my beloved Daniel! Today is our 2 month courting anniversary! We have grown to love eachother very deeply, and I thank the Lord daily for this unexpected blessing in my life! Whenever I talk with him, my heart beats fast with praise and love for the Lord, and love for Daniel! And everytime I stop and pray, thanks and heart felt gratitude are on my lips! The Lord just recently blessed me with a working car for a great deal, right in our time of need when cars is something our family is short on! And then the Lord blesses me with extra hours at work when money is something I need to help my family! We serve an amazing God! And none of these blessings are because of me, they are because the Lord has chosen to bless me! But these blessings didn't happen until I gave over my needs to the Lord! And he provided 3 wonderful blessings! What an amazing God we serve!

My dear fellow bloggers, God loves you so much he isn't satisfied until he has our whole heart, until he has our full attention! Change of the heart doesn't happen until the Lord is the one filling our hearts! I love you all so much, your prayers for me and Daniel and my family are greatly appreciated! God bless you all and thanks for reading!

Commitment....knowing and doing are two different things!

My heart is overflowing, I am so full of joy, its hard to hold it in! Before getting to my point, I just want to personally thank all of my dear bloggers for praying for me and Daniel! Our relationship has thus far been a very blessed experience, and the Lord is helping us grow in our love and respect of each other!

We all know what is right and what is wrong, thanks to the Lord for blessing us with a conscience! But do we always do what is right? Not at all! Knowing what is right, and doing what is right, are two completely different things! You can know what is right all you want to, but unless you follow through with your actions, it is meaningless! I made a commitment to the Lord to love my siblings, no matter what! And the Lord has helped me over come so much, and now, my siblings love to be with me, What a blessing!

I made the commitment to wait on the Lord to bring me the man he had for me! I committed my life to the Lord, and gave him everything! Was it an easy task? No, not in the least! But it was well worth the struggle! The Lord brought me Daniel! The Lord has used me as a tool to reach others! My heart is filled with the secret joy of the Lord, and even on gray days, I can't help but smile in the light of the Lord's love and blessing!

I am far from perfect, and I deserve death! But I have been forgiven! Have you given the Lord your commitment? Or do you just know its the right thing to do? Knowing and doing are two different things, and yet, they do walk hand in hand! Because you can't make a commitment unless you intend to follow through, and you can't make a commitment without knowing why!

The commitments in my life mean alot to me, and these are the commitments that are extra special! I commit to love my God, to love Daniel, to love my family, and to be a witness to the world! Humanly impossible? Maybe, but with the Lord, all things are possible! I encourage you to search your heart, and if you haven't, go from knowing, to doing! God bless you and thanks for reading!

Learning and Listening walk hand in hand!

Just spent the past 2 and a half hours having a blessed time listening to Daniel read from a book we are reading together and from the Bible!

It was wonderful just listening, and learning! Which brings about the reason I am writing this post! If we don't listen, we won't learn! Cause if we just assume we know something, we shut out any new information we might have been able to retain!

I love the little story presented in Joshua Harris' book Boy meets Girl, where he talks about how a little boy was fascinated when his father told him the reason we have 2 ears and one mouth is because the Lord wants us to listen twice as much as we talk! It blew the little boys mind, and he was so fascinated by it that he began always greeting people by asking, "Do you know why you have 2 ears and one mouth? Not only is it a cute story, but it has a good teaching in it! For those of you who don't know me, I am a talker! I can talk to the point that no one can get a word in except me! But it was wonderful to me to listen to Daniel read tonight because, I didn't need to talk, just listen! And I learned so much, just by listening!

The sad thing is alot of us only care about what we think, and how smart we will sound if we explain something a certain way, and whenever someone else starts talking, we are impatient in waiting for us to speak again because we like to listen to ourselves talk! But when we actually dedicate some time to listening, and not worrying about we are going to say next, you will find that you can retain alot more information, and it'll probably be something you didn't know before! So, Learning and Listening really do walk hand in hand! Because we won't learn unless we listen, and no one will want to learn from us by listening unless we first learn what we need to say!

So, I put before you Christian, the next time you find yourself talking a great deal, silence yourself, and listen! You will be amazed at how much you can learn through another brother or sister in Christ! And remember, You have 2 ears and one mouth because the Lord wants you to listen twice as much as you talk! Thank you for reading, and God bless!

Stand Still, and wait upon the Lord!

Ever found yourself mid step and all of a sudden get scolded and you literally fall on your face from the shock of being yelled at?! Well for me, I have been there done that! But have you ever found yourself doing this with the Lord? Have you thought you were doing the Lord's will, and suddenly he shuts the door in your face?!

I tell you Christian, the Lord has a purpose for everything he does! And there are some things we really need to discover and through the Lord's grace we will get the message!

So today I present you with this phrase, "Stand still and wait upon the Lord!" In our impatience we can miss something that the Lord is trying to teach us, and in our hurry, run into a dead end, like a marathon runner who was running so fast that as he turned the corner he didn't have time to stop by the time he saw the brick wall in front of him and then smacked right into it!

Sure the image paints a funny picture and makes you wanna laugh, but Christian, that embarrassed and hurt marathon runner is us! Like us he may have assumed that his path was cleared and instead found an obstruction! I am not saying that enthusiasm is something we don't need, but the Lord is the one calling the shots, and if you are in too much of a hurry, you will miss his warning! Since the Lord brought this to my mind I have been tempted to say to someone, "So, you didn't here your couch in time did you?" But Christian, we really need to realize that we are all in the same boat! Right now I am having one of those" I don't wanna wait moments"! Since me and my partner started courting, I have found myself struggling with the prospect of standing still and waiting for the Lord to tell us when its time for us to marry! And your thinking, whats the hurry? Wait until its your turn to wait before the Lord, and you will know what I mean! But does this mean that I should stop waiting just because I can't stand waiting any more? Absolutely not, because unlike us, God's timing is always perfect, even when we don't see it, he is never off!

Cause like the marathon runner, their couch is the one holding the stop watch! We are only guessing at how long we have been running! But he knows exactly, cause he has been keeping track!

So even though I can't stand the prospect of waiting, I am at peace knowing the the Lord knows best! So even though we can't stand our situation, knowing that the Lord is there should be a HUGE encouragement to us!

Sure, we also have those moments when we thought the Lord said go ahead, and then ran into resistance! And then stood there going, "Lord you said it was time." And he is up there shaking his head in fondness, saying, " You have been hearing things." When I think about this, it makes me smile! The Lord takes pleasure in being a big part of our lives, if we allow him!

To come to my point, the next time you find yourself hitting a brick wall stand back and search your heart! And if you find out you were mistaken, be willing to "Stand still and wait upon the Lord." Cause the more often we stop and think, and wait for the Lord's guidance, the less likely the possibility of us running into a brick wall with the word "NO" painted on it! None of us are perfect, thank the Lord he is the only one that is perfect, and he wants to always be a part of your life, a big part! Thanks for reading and God Bless!

Start your day with yourself or God?!

How do you start your day? What is the first thing you do when you get up, or better yet, the first thing you think about when you get up?

Is God the first thing you think about? Or is it yourself? Or maybe a boyfriend or girlfriend? Or the fact you have work today? What is your top priority?

In my first relationship, the first thing I thought about, the only thing I thought about was myself, and my boyfriend! It was a constant chain that connected with everything I did, even in prayer! So I put to you this day Christian, where do your thoughts lay? What holds your mind captive? Is it the Lord? Or is it yourself? If I had asked myself this question 2 years ago, the answer without a doubt for me, would be myself! I was a very selfish proud girl, and still am sometimes, even as a young woman!

The Lord really opened my eyes when he put me through my trial! I saw what I had become, and what had taken the place of the Lord! I had idolized a human being and put them in the place of God! I thank the Lord that I now start and end my day with the Lord! He is the first thing I think about in the morning, and the last thing I think about at night!

If we love the Lord, and truly have a desire to show him our love in our service to him, why are we not putting him first in our lives?! I discovered that when I start my day with myself, my day becomes a horrible mess, and no one wants to be near me, or help me in any way!

But when I started my day with the Lord, my day was blessed! Notice I say blessed and not perfect! I have my day to day struggles, but every time I am confronted by it, I pray to the Lord for strength!

My challenge to you Christian is to search your heart! Where do you stand? Yourself? Or God? Which one sounds better? Which one do you consider easier? If you want you can post your answers in a comment! I hope that this caused you to think hard, and if need be, start a new great habit, and maybe break a nasty one! I pray this will be a good teaching tool for all of you! Thanks for reading and God bless!

Pray for me!

Well alot happened in the past week and a half, and I am sorry I haven't posted in so long! The young man, who before the Lord I care about dearly came and spent a week with me and my family along with another good friend of mine. The Lord blessed the week to the full! And on Lord's day of last week, my father gave his blessing to Daniel to ask me if he could court me! So I experienced the most wonderful Lord's day of my life, when the man who I never thought would be brought to me asked for my hand in courtship!

The conversation we had afterward was wonderful, and I loved every minute of it, and I don't think we stopped smiling for a long time! Then on Monday of last week Daniel and I and my Mom and Dad when out for breakfast, and there the Lord blessed us yet more! My parents gave their full blessing to us, and promised their support whenever the Lord led us to marry! This is all of the Lord, I so don't deserve such a blessing! But I do know that I love this young man dearly! The Lord has caused my cup to overflow, and it wasn't until after I gave it all over to the Lord, that this all started happening! Almost right away, 2 weeks after I gave it over, I met him! Who would have known that the Lord would cause us to want to talk, or that in 4 months we would grow to love each other, and that 1 month after that that we would be courting! The Lord has given us so much to be thankful for, and we must keep reminding ourselves that we don't deserve it!

I want to personally thank all of my blogger friends for your support and your prayers, I love you all very dearly and I hope to continue to get comments and tips for my blog and my posts if you have any! Thank you for reading, and I hope before the Lord that he can use my story for others! God bless!

I am just happy!!!!!!!!!

That's all I can say, the Lord has filled my life with joy, and I am just overflowing with it! I can't wait for the next day, and on and on, cause my day will always start with the Lord, and that is the way it should be, and second to my God, is my love for my family, friends, and that special someone! All I can say Christian, is the sooner you give your life over to the Lord, the sooner a huge weight will be lifted from your shoulders! Thanks for reading and God bless!

Some things don't change!

Sometimes change is a scary thought, like moving to a new place, or getting married! There are some things that don't change no matter what!

Like when a loved one is away from home, the fact that you love them doesn't change, or when that night you both look at the same sky, and see the same moon, that will never change either! Or that you love your God, that will never change! When you have given your heart to the Lord, nothing will tear you from him, cause he is the one constant that sticks with you!

I like to think that the one I love can see the same sky I can from my house's drive way! Even when I wish he was here with me, I know the Lord is blessing us with an awesome sight! I am thankful for change in my life, that my heart has change, that my thoughts have changed for the better! My feelings for my family have changed for the better, and the Lord has brought someone to love me, that I just don't deserve! And that the Lord has given me a stronger conscience! This is change that is a wonderful thing that the Lord brings about!

And there are some things that you wish didn't change, but trust me, change is important! But so are those things in our life that won't change! I like to think that the Lord takes pleasure in seeing me, and the man he brought to me, looking at the same sky, and just having our breath taken away by his creation! That we dedicate our life to his service, and never want to be apart from him! This is the unchanging things that make life full of meaning! What would we do without the Lord's love, or the evidence of his majesty in his creation! What a blessing! Christian, my word to you is, change for the glory of God, and revel in the things that are unchanging! God bless you and thanks for reading!

What am I going to do?!

I have been having such a good week, but something is missing! And I know what it is! But how to deal with it until I get to see those people again?! I don't know! I am surrounded by my best friends, and yet I am lonely! Sad and true! I had such a good day yesterday, and yet I couldn't stop thinking of them! I know this post is a little random, but maybe righting down my thoughts will help me sort them! ha ha!

My cup over floweth!

It amazes me how much it brightens your day to start it with God! He is the first thing I think of in the morning, and the last thing I think of at night! I now find myself praying often, and find I have the strength I need for a difficult day when I look to the Lord for it!

And now I find myself becoming more patient, and thus I am getting along much better with my family! It gives my heart great joy that I find my little siblings want to sit in my lab, and give me a kiss and hug before I go to work!

The Lord has also brought love into my life, but I want so much to just keep my eye on the Lord this time, instead of cause my blessings to become idolized, which I no longer want to do that! I want the Lord to have the very center of my life, and he chooses to bless me, so be it, but he still will ever have the center!

I take no credit for what I have done right in my life, or my good reputation at work, or people's opinion of me! It is only because of the Lord that I stand here; alive, well, pure, and joyful in the Lord! I hope one day to hear from my God, the words, "Well done, my good and faithful servant!"

I firmly believe that anyone who doesn't have God in their life, is missing something very important and life changing, because it is only be the conviction of the heart that we do anything! And only the Lord's word convicts us to do anything of true value! I pray that you all have the joy of the Lord in your heart, and that you will always listen to his voice! Thanks for reading and God Bless!

Rain Drops Fall

The smell of a storm in the air,
The chill in the breeze,
And we outside have no time to spare,
Under the nearest shade we squeeze!

Rain drops fall!
Yes on everything in site!
And we can all hear the call,
That comes with the lightning light!

Rain drops fall in my hair,
They fall on the book in my hands,
But I love rain, so I don't care,
That I get covered wet in this liquid land!

The depression that comes with rain!
How gray the day does seem!
A strong emotion to hard to explain,
Until the sun, again, does beam!

Rain drops fall on my guitar,
They fall on the coat over my shoulder,
I really don't know where my affections are,
Things sure can't get any colder!

But the Lord still loves me,
No matter what gloom I recall,
When focused on Him how happy I can be,
Even, yes even when rain drops fall!

Being lonely!

Don't you just hate when your lonely?! Nothing makes you feel better, and in my case, I can be surrounded by people, and still be lonely! When I am lonely, I resort to talking to my dog, cause she always makes me smile!

But Christian, when we are lonely, this is an opportunity to talk with God! His presence can more than fill that empty space that's making you so lonely! Cause until you find a person to fill that space, you will be lonely!

But the Lord has more than enough love to go around! Trust me, when you find someone to give your love too, when they go some where and you don't see them for a long time, it will ache! That's why being able to get down on your knees, anytime, any place, is a wonderful blessing! The Lord wants us to talk to him, and when we don't, chances are, its just makes us more lonely! Cause Christian, our phone call connection with the Lord should never be dropped! Our phone is open, and the Lord is on the other end 24/7!

Yes, being lonely is ruff, but this is where the Lord uses out loneliness to his advantage! I pray that the next time you are lonely, you will just stop and pray, and reflect on all you have, and all the Lord has done for you, and just thank the Lord for your life! Cause, trust me Christian, none of us deserve eternal life! I hope you can walk away learning something from my experience! Thanks for reading and God Bless!

Who is that Lord?

I walk the road of lonely life,
I wish there was someone for me,
Who could relieve me of all my strife,
All I can say, is who can that someone be?

I pray both day and night,
For someone from the Lord,
That would love me with all his might,
And who was pure in thought and word!

The Lord holds me in his hand,
And he says, Be patient my child!
But its hard to be patient in this lonely land,
And my heart wants to run wild!

So I have given my love to God,
I say find me someone to give this too,
With patience my feet will be shod,
As I wait for the love of my life, you!

Today I stand in the hand of the Lord,
And in his other hand stands a young man,
And I cry, who is that Lord?
He says, this is who is in my plan!

I cry with joy!
As the man on the other side,
reaches his hand out with joy,
And says, Lord is this the one who will stand by my side?!

The Lord looks down with love and smiles,
Yes my children, I bless you together!
May you always look to me through life's miles,
And may you always honor and love one another!

God's plan is like no other,
His love for us is unbound,
Just like when he brought us together,
In God's love we are found!

It came softly....

The past three months have been a huge learning time for me! A time of spiritual strengthening, and the building of unexpected bridges.

After the loss of my first love, the depressing thoughts that I would never find that someone where constantly with me! It wasn't until I finally gave it over to the Lord, that I got slapped! I got down on my knees and said,"Lord, I am no longer going to "hunt" for the love of my life, I am going to just wait for you to bring that love to me, if it be your will! Amen!

Let me tell you, I didn't expect the Lord to answer my prayers so fast! Two weeks after this prayer the Lord brought someone wonderful into my life, but I didn't know it at the time!

I didn't understand why this person talked to me, or why we started emailing! I didn't understand when I started feeling for him! All I can say is I am grateful beyond words! So far I can feel God saying, "Yes he is the one!" I pray that God just continues to guide us in our special walk into a relationship! But I do know that it was all of a sudden that I loved this person! It came up on me so slowly, that I didn't even realize it! But I thank God over and over again! Who am I that I deserve this chance? I don't deserve anything I have, and definitely not this person, who I now love more than words can tell! Don't ask question about who, I just wanted to share my new found joy with you, my wonderful fellow bloggers! All I can say is my heart is filled with joy!

God has a plan that far out passes what our idea is, and then when we actually see God's plan, we are like, Why did I want to change everything, this is far better than anything I would have done! So the lesson for today is, "Stand still, and wait upon the Lord." He knows better, and if we just look to him, he will one day, if it is his will, bring your soul mate to you! And it may even scare you at how God's plan comes upon you! I know it wowed me! God bless you my fellow bloggers, and thanks for reading!

Life lesson number two: Love like CRAZY!!!!!

Since breaking my habit of listening to country music constantly, I have learned alot about it, and the messages it presents most of the time. But just tonight I turned on the radio and started searching for something to listen to to keep me awake, and found the song, Love like crazy! Don't let the title put you off, this song is just amazing! It totally fits my family! Its all about a man who married at a young age and had a big family, with barely enough money to support them! And how people all called him crazy! And someone asked him how he did it, and then the main part of the song goes like this: " Be a best friend, tell the truth, over use "I LOVE YOU!" Go to work, do your best, don't outsmart your common sense, never let your praying knees get lazy, and love like crazy!!!!!!!

This is yet another thing that proves my point about how important love really is! Without love, and God, we would be lost, and when we die, we would go to hell, cause God didn't love us in order to die for us! How horrible that would be!

I can say to you all right now, that I could never love my God, my parents, my siblings, my relatives, and my friends more than I already do! On my bad days, sadly, my family can't see my love, cause its covered by my bitterness! And sometimes, I just get depressed, without knowing why, sometimes when I think of someone I love, that doesn't know how much I really love them, just cause I don't have the gut to go to them and tell them, "You don't even know how much you mean to me, do you know that I love you so much?!" The thing is, if I told my sisters and brothers how much I love them, I would start crying, and then they wouldn't take me seriously, cause of course, siblings are different from parents!

So, if you were to ask me how I got through my young life, my reply would go something like this,"Pray to God, read his word, hope for faith and change, and love like crazy!"

Do you ever find yourself in a depressing situation?! Well this is where you need to start loving like crazy! Just go up to someone you love, and say, I Love you so much!! And then give them a big hug!

If I can I'll put that song on my playlist, and just remember, this song fits my family to a T! Cause everyone thinks that my parents were crazy to have 9 children, but my parents consider us a blessing, no matter how much trouble we cause, our parents will always love us, cause you know what?! They are just working themselves out of a job! Thank you mom and dad for not giving up on me, I Love you guys so much! So, the message for today?! "Be a best friend, tell the truth, over use I LOVE YOU! Go to work, do your best, don't outsmart your common sense! Never let your praying knees get lazy, And LOVE LIKE CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!" Thanks for reading and God bless!

Life lesson number one: Don't listen to Crystal!!!!!!

Don't be frightened, this is just me, letting go of frustration and anger in the best way I know how, writing! And on top of that I'll throw in a life lesson!

My boss Lisa gave me this title, and I liked it so much I kept it! I love my job working as a Swing Manager at McDonald's! But its not all hugs and kisses and pats on the back! I was promoted with the soul reason being I was a good worker and they liked my attitude, which was all because God was in my life, not because I am perfect, cause I am far from that!

I am used to praise at work, and I am used to being scolded and yelled at as well when my, as you punks put it, game is down! But there is one person I cannot in anyway, get along with or at least come to an understanding with at all! Crystal, my superior in years, but not reputation, again my reputation soul being on the Lord in my life! She tells me she can't stand me, that I don't do my job, and that I just stand still and watch everyone else do the work! Well, if that is what I really did at work, I wouldn't have this job at all! Crystal is close to losing her job because of her reputation! When Steph and Brandon heard about this, with Crystal not only making me very unhappy and slow in my work because of depression, and because she was telling me to do things that Steph and Brandon told me I shouldn't, things were supposedly cleared up! But now, tonight while Crystal worked, she resorted to spreading gossip of my "bad reputation". And guess who she decided to start it with?! My brother Seth!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like the loyal brother he is, he didn't respond to her at all, but the conversation consisted of her saying, " Seth I just can't stand your sister! She is so lazy, and she doesn't get her work done!"

Just let me lay out the fact that Crystal won't move a muscle or an eyelash if she sees someone within ear shot to make do it for her! And the fact that she started talking about me behind my back, and to my brother, as though she expects him to turn against me, his sister, and spread rumors! And that she expected him not to tell me about their little talk! And just so you know, when it comes to me, you either say it to my face, or keep it to yourself, cause nothing angers me more than hearing it from someone else! And then she tries to talk to me all nice and everything as though she has loved me like a friend for the longest time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MAN!!!!!!!!! You can see how much this angers me...so on to our life lesson now shall we?!

As we go through life as a Christian, there are several "Johny" and in this case, "Janey rain clouds" that will be determined with everything they say to bring you down and make you feel like you aren't getting anywhere!! Satan does the same thing, at every point in your life, he will try to make you doubt what God has promised, and doubt where you are as a Christian! But this is our time to stand tall in the midst of persecution and hatred! This is our time to look up toward heaven and shout, " You are my God O Lord, and I will be strong in the light of your love, and your word!!!!!!!!!!!"

So just remember Christian, there may be several "Crystals" in your life, but that doesn't mean that God isn't right there taking every step right along with you! Trust in the Lord! Don't listen to Crystal, listen to God! God bless you ,and thanks for reading!

Looking to hard at a small part of the Big Picture!

When I was at work tonight, my boss started freaking out! Our safes alarm started going off and when she shut it, it froze, and the alarm wouldn't stop and she couldn't open up the safe! Man, and I thought I had been having a bad day!

After several minutes of trying to find a solution to her dilemma, Steph was on the verge of tears! And then my co-worker Tyler walks up to her, and says in a wishful tone, " Too bad the safe isn't plugged in, then we could unplug it and then replug it in so it would restart!" And then it dawned on her, it is plugged in! Sure enough, she unplugged and replugged it in and ta da!

We all have those times, when we are looking too closely at our work, and need someone from the outside to point out a simple solution! Like working on a puzzle, if we concentrate to hard, it takes forever to put it together! Funny isn't it? When we try too hard, we often miss how simple our problem really is!

This lesson can be applied to life as well! When looking at the Big Picture of life, we often get frustrated by that little "splotch" in the handiwork! We really need to take several steps back and just look at it with an easier eye! The splotch is swallowed in the beauty and master piece of God's plan for your life!

So next time your too close to something that is making you frustrated, take several steps back, and several deep breaths, and try again! Maybe one day I will learn to look at the Big Picture the right way! Just remember, don't look at just one part of the picture, look at the WHOLE picture!

God bless you and thanks for reading!

A time to breath!

Have you ever said, I won't stop holding my breath until this matter is resolved? Well, now I can finally stop holding my breath for several reasons!

My parents secretly sent out for my High school diploma so that they could surprise me with it, but my mom forgot that it was coming in and sent me to get the mail. And so, being a graduate I could read a little, and it didn't take a genius to find out what the package was!

My Mom and Dad couldn't read the diploma to me, cause they were kinda choked up! I love them so much, standing by me through my childhood, and now, young adulthood! Next year I leave for college, with the full intention of coming back to family and friends unless something turns up (like finding a soul mate). Soon me and my friend Erik will take pictures of us in our cap and gown, with our families! I will be sure to post some pictures on here when they have been taken. Its seems hard to believe that I have been writing in this blog for almost 2 years! Now, I am just sitting here, breathing deeply the sweet air of graduation.

I am still holding my breath in anticipation of my newest member of my family, I pray that my mom has a quick delivery. This will be her last child, so as soon as it is all over, I will stop holding my breath!

There are many moments in our life when we need to breath. When we pray, when we are angry, when we are sad, when were getting married, and so the list goes on. This post just came to me as I spent an evening with my family, the thought, "Wow, I am done!"

Holding your breath for very long periods can be very unhealthy, so I would advice considering letting go soon cause the longer you wait, the more in shock you are after you let go! HA HA! I pray all you fellow readers still enjoy reading my posts, I sure enjoy writing them! God bless you, and remember, there is always a time to breath! Thanks for reading!

Where is the joy?

The time we spend with the Lord, should be a happy time, a time of love and happiness! But if you were to look around in church, or in Bible study, what do you find?

Boredom, hurried actions, sleepiness, distraction, and maybe even a foul mood! These aren't the actions of people who are enjoying their time with the Lord, but of people who wish this would just hurry up and get over with!

WHERE IS THE JOY?! Why can't we all enjoy each others company, and the company of our Lord, without strained feelings and actions?

Can a family enjoy time with the Lord, when they argued and fought their whole way through the morning? Why is the Lord's day any different from our fun days? Why can't it be the same?!

I can say without hesitation, that the people around you effect how you feel. If everyone is dreading the day, you start to dread it too! If everyone is tired and down, you soon follow! So why isn't the joy of the Lord rubbing off between the people who supposedly love God?! Why, instead of love, we get anger and short tempers?

I wish with all my might, that I could experience a joyful Lords day, or bible study! One that is just electric with happiness and joy! Like the Lords day and bible studies I experienced during my time in North Carolina, all the people I met there were joyful and happy, and they just rubbed you the right way! There wasn't any harsh words or actions, just joy!

I believe that God wants to see us joyful when we come to spend time with him, he wants us to "enjoy" what he and his word has to offer! But how is that going to happen, when no one is joyful? I pray that you are that person that brings the joy back into the church or gathering this week, no more foul moods, just happy smiles and thoughts!

As you can tell, this subject frustrates me on a number of levels, cause I have experienced first hand, a negative Lords day! I want to see joy, not obligation! So, the next time you spend time with the Lord, rub around the joy! Thank you for reading and God bless!

Light in the darkness

Many people walk the path of sin,
but light from the darkness shall spring,
Our Savior in the end shall win,
And souls in heaven shall sing!

On the path of life I tread,
But so many souls are lost!
And many more, their hopes are dead,
And their souls into hell are tossed!

A warrior of the Lord I must be!
No more will I hide and wait,
The Spirit of the Lord I must find in me,
I promise you Lord, I will no longer wait!

Rescued souls I harvest,
Only for the Lord I work,
But my heart is not the best,
Yet the Lord has done his work!

Praise the Lord, so many saved!
They sing glory to him!
And with gold the streets are paved,
Walking on heaven's glory safe to him!

What do I do?

Have you ever come across a time in your life when something is weighing heavy on your heart, and yet, there are no words to express it?! It is so frustrating, and yet, it seems so right that you can't explain it, can't even begin to try!
Tonight, when I took my dog out for her walk, I looked up, and for the first time in weeks, saw a clear night sky, and my heart swelled with awe as I look at the stars! No words can even begin to describe why such a sight takes my breath away, or that I start to tear up, and let the tears roll down my cheeks.
Same goes for when I look at someone I love. You almost believe that just by looking at them, they will know without looking at you, just what your thinking! But then comes when you really want them to know how you feel, and yet, nothing seems right...it just seems right to keep silent, and just let it take your breath away!
When I look at the stars, or at someone I love, the same question always comes to mind....what does God have planned for my life?
I would like to think, that his plan is for me is to graduate college with no broken bones, or hearts. And that I would marry and raise a family, instead of starting a career that in the end, I will end up hating, like my dad.
I must always remind myself of my quote I made up, "God knows, and that's all I need to know." But I also like to quote a friend of mine, who says to me often, "You don't know what the future holds, but you know who holds the future." I like to think that God is up in heaven right now, shaking his head at me and saying,"Rachel, Rachel, you silly little girl! Why are you so afraid to let me take over? Where has your faith gone? Don't you know that I have everything planned out just right, and if you would just listen, you'll find something better than what you have in mind!"
So, what do I do? And just out of curiosity, what would you do? Life is no easy road, and there are alot of things we will never fully understand, until when we die, and see God, we won't even be able to remember what bugged us so much that we wanted to end life early just to get it over with! I believe, that if we stop clutching the wheel of life so tightly, we just might be able to live, for real, in a place that seems unbearable at the time!
Just remember my fellow readers, that life is unexpected for everyone, except God! He knew before you were born, where you were going to end up! But if you fiddle with God's plan, that's when things get ugly, and the painting of life looks a little bit sloppy, cause we just couldn't help but bump God's hand while he was at work!
So what do I do? The answer is nothing! Just stand still, and wait upon the Lord! God bless and thanks for reading!

A Split Second Flash!

Last night I was watching a thunderstorm, with lightning flashing down in fast little electric spurts, and the noise of thunder afterwards, there is nothing like a good thunderstorm!

And as I watched the lighting flash and disappear again, I thought about how opportunity often flashes by in the same split second intervals. Sometimes we only have seconds to act before it disappears!

The opportunity to tell someone about their salvation, the opportunity to tell someone you love them, the opportunity to get down on your knees and pray, and so the list goes on and on!

When I think of opportunity, I often think of our Lord Jesus! He had the opportunity to leave out suffering for us! He could have walked away you know! He is GOD! But the fact that he stayed shows us just how much he really loves us!

Have you experienced a split second passing to do something right?! I know I have! As we learn to watch for them, we can pounce on them when they present themselves! I hope that I will continue to learn to pounce on split second opportunity! Don't pass up a split second flash, lunge for it, and don't let go! Thanks for reading and God Bless!